CrankyRants.com

A new study in postmenopausal women demonstrates how one half of a cup of soy nuts each day may work as well as anti-hypertension medication to lower blood pressure. And women with moderately elevated blood pressure, a condition known as pre-hypertension, also showed reductions in their blood pressure after eight weeks of eating soy nuts, Dr. Francine K. Welty of Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston and her colleagues found.

In response to the exciting new discoveries, the American Medical Board is recommending that those with hyper-tension or higher than normal levels of cholesterol and high blood pressure should immediately receive a sex change if they are not currently a women and chryogenically freeze themselves until their body has aged to the point of the the decline of menopause. Then eat lot’s of soy nuts.

As travel season approaches, you need to be careful. These days, it’s becoming increasingly more dangerous to travel the globe. Not because of airline security or road-hazards. No, anymore your biggest concern should be… circulation.

Zahra Ghasemi, a physical therapy supervisor at Cedars Sinai Medical Center, conducts research into venous thromboembolism, a form of blood circulation disorder that is apprently hightened by long-haul travel. Overseas flights. long-distance driving. They all carry a small amount of danger from too little physical activity during such long trips. Suggested tips include wearing loose clothing, not crossing your legs during long flights, and of course… walk around as much as possible during the trip or during stopovers.

The lesson to learn? Plan all of the adventure vacations that you like. Travel the world on a global holiday with exciting destinations offering scuba diving with sharks or rock climbing or wild-animal punching in Africa. Bungie-jump off of a cliff in some European hot spot after hang-gliding from a mountain retreat in between snow-skiing trips and white water rafting.

Just please, for your own safety! Do NOT cross your legs. Ever!

What will $25 million buy you these days. How about a good meal with a really… Really good view.

Martha Stewart is sending gracious living into orbit, picking a gourmet space meal of duck breast confit and semolina cake with dried apricots for her billionaire space tourist “best friend” and his comrades in the international space station.

Charles Simonyi, a software engineer and one of the 400 richest Americans according to Forbes Magazine, is set to lift off aboard a Soyuz space capsule with two Russian cosmonauts. He paid roughly $25 million for a 13-day trip to the space station.

You know, nothing says mid-life crisis like blowing the Gross National Product of a small Eastern European nation to have a zero gravity duck dinner. Atmosphere. That’s what diners are looking for these days. Heh. Atmosphere. Cause… they’re in space. Little gastronomical humor there.

No word yet on how the fabulous meal that Martha is laying out will taste after being crammed into a small toothpaste tube… cause I’m pretty sure that’s how they do things in space these days. Don’t want a stray apricot getting stuck in any Deploy Chute buttons or anything.

Alternative recruitment advertising strategies include podcasting jobs.