A new study in postmenopausal women demonstrates how one half of a cup of soy nuts each day may work as well as anti-hypertension medication to lower blood pressure. And women with moderately elevated blood pressure, a condition known as pre-hypertension, also showed reductions in their blood pressure after eight weeks of eating soy nuts, Dr. Francine K. Welty of Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in Boston and her colleagues found.

In response to the exciting new discoveries, the American Medical Board is recommending that those with hyper-tension or higher than normal levels of cholesterol and high blood pressure should immediately receive a sex change if they are not currently a women and chryogenically freeze themselves until their body has aged to the point of the the decline of menopause. Then eat lot’s of soy nuts.