There was a time when the pantry had only a few dried goods in it. The fridge was small and cooled by a block of ice. And families got along just fine. Today, I am actually throwing out packets of ancient soup mix and jello boxes so I can make room for the 50 pound block of pop-tarts that just came home from the bulk store.

Sixty years ago, no one needed to stock up on all of this food, because if they needed meat, bread, and a pack of smokes… they’d walk the block and a half to the corner store or meat market… and pick it up. Done. Take it home, make your sandwich, and wolf it down with a smooth and healthy Marlboro chaser.

Even now, the convenience is greater… yet we still stock up. Gone is the exercise, just drop by the super market on the way home. But no one has the patience or tolerance for that either, what with the ever present danger of ”Elderly Coupon Creepers” or “Children of the Cold” (and flu. Spreading germs. Get it?).

So that leads us to the next stage in the evolution of the corner store. Just need a pack of smokes and some sandwich fixins? Don’t even get up. We now buy our cigarettes online at DiscountCigaretteShop.com and our steaks come in a bag from eBay. Just takes a few extra days for everything to arrive. So… you know. Better stock up.

As soon as Dean Kamen gets off his ass and builds us an electric sandwich maker instead of some 10 grand scooter… we’ll really be in business.